Sunday 10 July 2016

Everybody hates Cris (and friends)


So it’s all come to a head. The festival of football that we’ve been treated to over the past 30 days ends tonight. And only two teams remain, France and Portugal. The French will be favourites to lift the trophy; they’ve got the best squad and, on top of that, they’re the hosts so they can expect the support of the majority in attendance. But it’s not just the home fans who’ll be behind the French. Everybody hates Portugal!

I get that a lot of people see Portugal and Cristiano Ronaldo as being one and the same, and that a lot of people dislike “CR7”. I get that the Portuguese are very fortunate to have even reached the final, I mean they came third in a pretty average group, without winning a single game (que the anti-24 team competition brigade, FYI I disagree with you), and then found themselves on the easier side of the knockout draw. But the hatred is still a bit disproportionate in my eyes.
You're just a fat Jim Carey! 
I mean they were involved in the best game of the first round, the back and forth goal fest with Hungary. In the same game Ronaldo broke his duck with one of the best goals of the tournament. Yet we still loathe them, and I keep hearing comparisons between them and the Euro 2004 Greek side.

I’d just like to point out that I dislike Portugal as much as the next (non-Portuguese) man. I’m no different to the rest of you. The ideal outcome of tonight’s encounter would be a resounding, but  entertaining, French win. I just can’t think of where it all went wrong?!? I used to love watching Portugal in the days of the “Golden Generation” with Figo, Concecao, Nuno Gomes, Pauleta, Vitor  Bia and Jao (and Sao) Pinto. I also didn’t mind them in the days of Deco, Simao and Maniche.

All I can say is Allez Le Bleus! May the blood of our enemies run through our fields (that’s a national anthem joke by the way)!

Enjoy the final!
Quaresma now gives talks in youth clubs on staying out trouble with the law 
PS remember how Jao Pinto always wore that Robbie Fowler style plaster on his nose, and how Maniche looked like a fat Jim Carey? Also why does Quaresma look like the top man in a Latino gang at an American Super-Max prison? I swear he’s even got tear drops tattooed on his cheek! Is that where he’s been all these years? He was well off the footballing radar for a few years, I’m assuming he’s out on good behavior having renounced his past life and turned his back on Los Zetas.

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